The main challenge in writing a good etheree is to combine a clear and interesting message with an aesthetically pleasing form. Let’s say you want to write a straight-forward single etheree on the topic of, perhaps, sunsets, as nature poetry is a special favourite of mine. Start the first line with a one-syllable word, preferably a fairly short one, no longer than five letters for an attractive end result.
So let’s start as follows:
On
You will now need a two-syllable second line which should be only a few letters longer than the first. It might be one word or two. Let’s try something:
On
viewing
You will notice the difference in length between the two lines. Here’s where a thesaurus comes in handy. You want a slightly shorter synonym for viewing. One I often use is: http://thesaurus.reference.com/
Let’s try this version:
On
noting
One letter can make all the difference in the appearance of an etheree!
And now you can see that the two lines are not disproportionate. You will now need a three-syllable second line, which might consist of one, two, or three words. One idea might be to think ahead of the colours of a sunset and begin introducing that concept in line 3:
On
noting
bright colours
Again, bright colours looks too long. Let’s try this:
On
noting
sunsets in
You can see that this line works both in terms of syllabication and line length, and will allow us focus on colours in line 4. So now we will think of the colours of a sunset - orange, yellow, red, crimson, scarlet, vermilion, gold, coral, etc. and see which ones work best. Here’s a sample of a four syllable line added to the developing poem:
On
noting
sunsets in
yellow and red
You can see that yellow and red is somewhat childish when you see it in print and is a tiny bit too long. Let’s go with:
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
You can see that vivid orange is both a better length and more mature. In the fifth line, we will continue to describe the colours, using five syllables, so perhaps we could try yellow and crimson:
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
yellow and crimson
But, alas, once again that looks too long. Coral is a shorter word and would work, and strangely the word scarlet seems to take up slightly less line space on HTML than does crimson:
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
Yes, that looks better. Now, think of the effect seeing such a sunset might have on you as a writer, the material it might provide for poetry, and remember that you will need six syllables. Perhaps you might want to try the line: poetic fantasy. Let’s see how it works.
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
poetic fantasy
Oops! That is too short, even though it has the required six syllables. You don’t want your etheree to resemble crooked teeth! A slightly longer line might be: a poet’s ready pen.
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
Now imagine the colours flowing into your pen and providing poetry. A possible seventh line might be: scribbles in multi-coloured:
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in multicoloured
Yikes! That is a bit too long even if you are American and omit the u. A handy-dandy thesaurus might give variegated as a synonym, and it has the same number of syllables.
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
Better! Now we are ready to tackle an eight-syllable line, and remember we are getting near the end of the poem, so you have to wrap up your point. You will need to start the line with the word inks since you have set that up in line seven. Let’s try inks the writer’s awe evident
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks the writer’s awe evident
Darn! Too long again. Let’s try a longer word for awe, and tighten the line up to read: inks fascination evident:
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks fascination evident
That’s just a hair too short. Apparent is slightly longer and means roughly the same, although as an English teacher I know the difference.
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks fascination apparent
That’s more attractive. Now, for our nine-syllable line, in which we must continue to wrap up our thoughts. Where is the fascination apparent? In our poetry, of course! So let’s try: in poetry appearing as I
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks fascination apparent
in poetry appearing as I
This is a tad too short, and sometime we need to reframe our thought process slightly; since we have not used the first person thus far, it is best to avoid it at this late point. So let’s change the line to read in such verses as arise upon:
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks fascination apparent
in such verses as arise upon
Nice! Now, for the final line. The verses arise, obviously, upon - guess what? Looking at the sunset, and we need ten syllables to convey that notion. Let’s try viewing this multicoloured scenery.
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks fascination apparent
in such verses as arise upon
viewing this multicoloured scenery
That is too long, so let’s try a synonym for viewing and a different adjective to describe the scenery. Maybe we might try something like beholding, which has three syllables and is not much longer than viewing, and amazing as our adjective, which will now need three syllables instead of the four of fascinating.
On
noting
sunsets in
vivid orange
scarlet and coral
a poet’s ready pen
scribbles in variegated
inks fascination apparent
in such verses as arise upon
beholding this amazing scenery
Eureka!
Copyright Carol Knepper 2008 -
Now, think of a topic and try one on your own, following the guidelines.
